Cop Mama is taking a break from hosting Mama Guilt Mondays, but that doesn't mean the Mama Guilt has taken a break from me. So, I'm going to continue posting some of my Mama Guilt Monday moments from time to time (this week on Tuesday, which is just my style).
My mama guilt this week involves my oldest, Dakota. Dakota's school starts at 8:05am. In order to have enough time to put her instrument away, go to her locker, and still get to class on time, I need to have her dropped off and in the building no later than 8:00. This means that we can leave our house no later than 7:35am to make the drive across town to the middle school.
The little girls' school doesn't start until 8:50. Starting at 8:15, they can be dropped off at walk-and-talk (or sit-and-talk in the gym if it's raining), but they HATE that. I can't say that I blame them. There are two assistant teachers (3 on a lucky day) on the playground to monitor ALL the kids who are there before school. By the time the teachers come out to get the classes, there may be 200+ kids out there. I know the ladies who are the monitors and they are wonderful people, but they can't possibly monitor everything with that many kids.
So, I usually try to kill some time after we drop off Dakota and drop the girls off around 8:35. Sometimes we go to Wal-Mart and look at toys or pick up an item or two that we need. Sometimes I have an errand I need to run, like dropping something in the mail. But usually, I don't really have anything in particular to do. I feel bad for them because I have to get them up earlier than they would like and rush them through their breakfast, etc just so they can go wander around the store or ride around in the van. They would so much rather be at home watching Zula Patrol or sleeping in another 3o minutes. So, occasionally, I will pick up a treat for them. Sometimes, it's donuts. Other days, it's a drink to share from the gas station. Today, it was chicken biscuits and hashbrowns from Chick-fil-A (the biscuits were free. Hooray!).
Then, I feel guilty because Dakota wasn't included. The kids are really good about not saying anything to her about it, which helps, but I still feel bad. But, to include her in the treat, we would have to get up and ready even earlier and would still have that 30 minutes to kill after we dropped her off.
I always try to remind myself that Dakota does get special treats that the others don't get too. Just the other day, I took her to hear the High School band play. We stopped at the dollar store on the way and she got a candy bar. She's gotten to go to 3 dances at her school this year and we've given her money for things there. It all works out in the end, I guess.
So, how to you make things "fair" when they aren't necessarily "the same" for your kids? I'd love to hear your ideas. Leave me a comment and let me know.